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I spent the day dreaming November 4, 2007

Posted by Victoria Fredericks in Writing.
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I spent the day dreaming. The light was falling in through my window, like a promise of everything that felt so perfect and so right. I felt a change; and I feel no pain. He is all I could ask for. It takes a lot to remove me from the love affair I have with my own self. I am thankful to have such a sense of who I am, and it grows everyday. Yet it’s a self that’s so contained; it’s hard to expose it to someone else. I keep it within myself, in candlelit nights and waning afternoons, listening to music, musing to myself. I wish I could say, when I was with him, pearls would fall from my lips, and I could be every bit a dream; only doesn’t work like that; as the dearest parts of me cannot be given away…

I want love to be simple. I want to give all of myself, and have it somehow still feel as if it is not enough. I want it to feel boundless. Wounds heal and we’re left with scars that tell of our past, but time changes leaving behind only echoes of who we once were. As everything around me withers and turns to gray, I only find myself more willing to bloom. I find myself strong…with an alarming sense of translucent fragility; where it came from and why, I could never explain. I don’t know who could possibly understand my complicated inner world, so wild and untamed, so innately good it couldn’t fool itself yet alone another living being. My soul is steeped in honesty, in a certain willingness, with a craving for another human so specific, it forever seemed impossible to find–that kindred spirit, who you can just be with, and there is no need for anything but simple togetherness.

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Comments»

1. Blair - November 5, 2007

You have such a way with words 🙂

2. Tiffany - November 5, 2007

Aw, I can relate to everything you wrote.. Sometimes, you don’t have to talk to feel close with someone. You just need to be together.


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